What “No” Doesn’t Mean

Posted by on Feb 18, 2017 in Courage, Fear, Leadership | 0 comments

It’s taken me quite awhile to learn this lesson. I now know it’s true.

Wisdom from Seth Godin:

What “no” means

I’m too busy
I don’t trust you
This isn’t on my list
My boss won’t let me
I’m afraid of moving this forward
I’m not the person you think I am
I don’t have the resources you think I do
I’m not the kind of person that does things like this
I don’t want to open the door to a long-term engagement
Thinking about this will cause me to think about other things I just don’t want to deal with

What it doesn’t mean:

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Bias From the Bottom

Posted by on Jan 17, 2017 in Compassion, Courage, Culture, Leadership | 0 comments

Author Richard Rohr makes an intriguing observation about the uniqueness of biblical authors versus most authors:

“The vast majority of people throughout history has been poor, disabled, or oppressed in some way (i.e., “on the bottom”) and would have experienced history in terms of a need for change. The people who wrote the books and controlled the social institutions, however, have almost always been the comfortable people on the top. Much of history has been recorded from the side of the winners, except for the unique revelation of the Bible, which is an alternative history from the bottom: from the side of the enslaved, the dominated, the oppressed, and the poor, culminating in the scapegoat figure of Jesus himself.

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A Village of Fathers

Posted by on Dec 8, 2016 in Character, Community, Culture, Fathers, Heroes, Leadership, Transformation | 0 comments

If you’ve read many of my posts in the past there’s a good chance you’ve seen me quote an African proverb I learned from a Kenyan pastor: “The boys in the village must be initiated into manhood, or they will burn down the village…just to feel the heat.” When I heard this statement it caused many observations I’ve had about our society to fall into place. It explains why fatherless inner-city gang members turn to violence. It explains why self-absorbed frat boys, with no healthy mentors, assert their will on women. It explains the profound urgency of father-son programs like Peregrine’s Passage to Manhood. Watch this remarkable clip illustrating some mentors who have their eyes on the next generation of African American young men. Man, am I glad for men like this! May their tribe...

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Who’s In Charge Here Anyway?!

Posted by on Mar 18, 2016 in Character, Culture, Hope, Leadership | 9 comments

trumpcruzHave we seen a more circus-like political process in our lives? I haven’t. I doubt you have.

We are all familiar with the boorish, demeaning, literally below-the-belt accusations flying from one candidate to the other in the current marathon race for the U. S. presidency. Each day brings another series of bewildering headlines revealing head-scratching results and stomach-turning behavior that seem to represent the worst of American politics. I’m saddened by it and ashamed of it.

In a recent conversation with a group of friends we carefully shared our frustrations, as well as our hopes for how this might end. I say “carefully” because we’ve probably all learned that there is no telling which of your friends is going to launch into an angry rant about his favorite candidate, or against any that you might entertain. We’re walking on eggshells. And that’s with friends.

The depth of emotion in this caucus season reveals the long-simmering disappointment so many feel with our system and our leadership. OK, fine. That doesn’t excuse violent behavior or relationship-killing words.

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The Lure of Passivity

Posted by on Jan 12, 2016 in Character, Courage, Fear, Leadership, Transformation | 0 comments

I really couldn’t have said this any better than my friend Chris Bruno of Restoration Project just did. In fact, he says it even better than I could have. This is worth your time…

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Are You Constrained or Unleashed?

Posted by on Jan 22, 2015 in Character, Compassion, Courage, Leadership, Legacy, Significance, Transcendence | 0 comments

Not long ago I heard a speaker, sadly I don’t remember his name, say, “Don’t just give people rules to follow; give them values to believe in.” I think that is remarkably perceptive advice. Rules constrain people into obedience due to another person’s position of authority or ability to punish non-compliance. Values unleash a person to action based on what he or she believes in; they form a powerful connection with ideas or principles that matter on a heart level. At Peregrine Ministries, we guide and inspire men on their life journey, to help them leave a life-giving legacy. In doing so, we are compelled by the following values: Legacy Legacy is the part of us that lives in others after we’re gone. We receive an inheritance we didn’t choose. Transformation determines the legacy we will pass on. Transformation Every word we write and every action we take as a ministry is to see the hearts of men increasingly transformed into the likeness of Christ. Authenticity We aspire to conduct our relationships with a commitment to being truthful about ourselves, so that the man others see is increasingly consistent with the man we are beneath the surface. Community We pursue the “Third Place”- not home, and not work, it’s a setting where we know others deeply, reveal ourselves genuinely, and simply enjoy each other’s presence. Integrity The commitment to make every decision with honesty, even when it hurts. We willingly speaking the truth in love; bringing both courage and compassion. Compassion The conscious choice to feel what others feel, and to act on their behalf. It comes from our own wounds that are healed and redeemed. Redemption When God takes a part of our story that is broken, and turns it around 180 degrees to make it a powerful source of healing for others. Mission Being compelled to act, speak and live from the deepest part of our hearts for the benefit of others. The unique combination of God-given talents, gifts and values that create God’s calling in our lives. We can’t not do it. Adventure We embrace the risk, challenge and exhilaration of regularly engaging with Creation. Significance Reminding ourselves, and teaching men, that our significance is not based on our Power, Possessions and Prestige, but on the foundation of who our Creator is. Transcendence Though we live in a broken world, we intentionally anticipate, plan for and celebrate the periodic glimpses of overflowing joy, jaw-dropping beauty and staggering glory we encounter in nature, music, art, writing, sports and relationships. These are all clues of an eternal, transcendent hunger in our hearts. These values inspire us at Peregrine to do what we do. Have you ever identified your deepest values? What do your actions, your priorities and your emotions reveal about your values? I’d love to hear what they...

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